Tuesday, August 01, 2006

These are the times...

...when I totally want to kick my husband's behind! Things are rather crazy here in our little corner of the world. I seem to be getting a little more upset with him as the days go forward. Even though it has been over 3 years, I just can't believe that he would make such a stupid choice that would affect our family for many, many years. I know that it was all apart of God's plan, I get that, but sheesh I am busting my booty to make ends meet. (I know He is still working on me too! I get that too!) And I also known that he (hubby) has to deal with knowing that I am here busting my booty. He hates it just as much as I do, at least I think he does!

What he doesn't get is that life still gets in the way. Things happen and for reasons that none of us will ever know the answer to 'why'. We found out about 3 weeks ago that my MIL's (His mother, obviously) boyfriend/companion is dying of cancer. He has 2 brain tumors, lung, liver, kidney, throat and Lord only knows where else. He was fine 5 weeks ago. And now he is dying right before our eyes. My MIL just lost her mother about 2 months ago and she cared for her up until the moment she went home to be with the Lord. Also 9 years ago her husband passed away after battling cancer for a few short months. She cared for him too, at home. All of this has sent her into a bit of a questioning 'why'. Why would the Lord do this to me again? She knows that she will get through this but is having a hard time dealing with everything. Which is natural, right?

Then among that, I still have to maintain my business and produce the orders I receive. I have to keep my house in some sort of up-keep. I have to transport my kids to their different functions, this week it is soccer camp in the evenings after school. We have to get homework done and clean rooms. Last night we didn't get home until well after 11:30 or so from my MIL's house, which means that the kids were real bears this morning. 2 of them left their homework here on the counter...oh well! To say the least I had a grumpy, sassy bunch of younguns to deal with.

And this week I have the honor of making my grandparent's 60th Wedding Anniversary cake, which we will celebrate on Saturday. I am making a 3 tiered cake with small drop flowers for the borders that I have to make ahead of time. So this morning I have been doing those, along with purse orders and making beds and folding clothes and doing dishes that I couldn't get to yesterday (I hate that!), and I really need to be getting over to my MIL's house as soon as possible. She cannot stand to be alone, she is afraid that he is going to pass and she will be the only one there.

The reason I am letting you guys know all about this, is for 1 I know that you will listen and for 2 I need prayer and for 3 I may not be around the blogosphere too much this week. So, if you have missed me commenting, sorry! I will get around to it when things calm down a bit.

Now do you see why I get angry with my husband at times like these?

(If you are my family and you are reading this, I am fine, I just needed to vent a little. I know how you are and you know how I am...I will get through this and look back on it in a couple of weeks. Do not worry about me or my sanity! I am a survivor! Oh, Mom, can the kids get dropped off at your house tonight after soccer camp, I have to take Ryan to his softball game...thanks! Love you!)

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